In the house

Pouting lips in neon pink
Cherry balm in Fruit rubber gum
On your knees,make that slow and quick

Air is hot then it's cold
Holding that ,holding there
There's touch down everywhere

Remember to zip first and then fly
Let the robin explore in the wild
And dig deeper with the forest guide

Round one, round two
Countdown back to 10 to noon
Till breathing's still in tune

Ryan's Guitar

Looks as though it was a bore
She sits in the bar with her IPod on
Reading the yellow book page forty four

I asked her why
And I loved her silly alibis
Her lips may say a million lies
But I still believe it a billionth times

I guess she's my hon
when i came undone
And she asked for a song
Yet don't know who I am

She's not looking when I sing
But I feel her heart beating from within

I wonder if she would give me a kiss tonight
Just to confirm if the number's right

Is she the one?

She had freckles on her cheek
And was prettier than I
Her eyes were deep set
Unlike mine

You tell the world of your plan
And proclaim the words I dreamed would be mine
2 years you had been
Is she really the one?

December was when I've known
You and just you alone
And I fell for that stupid song
I did not know
September you were already owned

I wish you well and good
That happiness befall on you
It's the only way to show
That what i feel for you is true

You're so Late and I'm so Waiting

Damn the clock that ticks to the minute
And that cuckoo bird that comes with it
Did you bring the ring with the date inscribed?
Or were you looking for it all these times?

The kettle is whistling
And it's a boil
The newspaper has been delivered
And it's breaking dawn
The milk is poured and the egg is cooked
table is prepped for you to join

You call me when you're near Jupiter
So I'd know
If I could let the mailman taste the Coke
Or the neighbor repair my door

In any case you'll be late
I'll be in the mall shopping with a mate
And if the traffic keeps you still
I'll just see you in the room and you'll pay the bill

Let's dance,shall we?

In the splendor night of this New year eve
We'll choose the background that would fit
The tux you're wearing and the gown I'm in

Maybe to the beat of Madonna?
or the reggaes of Jamaica?
in a disco theme?
or to that classic waltz thing?

I'll take champagne from france
and you could just drink that russian vodka straight up
Or we'll just have the beer to go
Downtown from a 711 store

would you like to see the moon
or just the twinkling stars
or the pretty dazzling fireworks?

Let's just dance shall we?
Maybe best to the beat of your heart
In this rain, thru this cloud
In your arms, down that couch
Sipping our tears and the blood

I kind of like you, well sort of

I kinda like you
The way you smile
And your laughter and the Aww!

I kinda like it when you pass me by
And how your scent blows my mind

I kinda like when you crack a joke
And when it sends shiver to my bones

I kinda like your eyes
And your walk
And when the jeans you wear do all the talk

I kinda like the sound when you sing
Even the moves you dance to the obscene

I kinda like the way you make me feel
Like you could just heal the part of me that is ill

I kinda like it if you would only show
what i need to do for the us to grow

I kinda like it when you do
I kind of like you as you

Don't let me hold you

My dear beloved,
Please hold my hand
For I can not hold yours
I may hold you too loose
Or maybe too close
And if we cross the bridges
And if it should fall
I may lose my grip
And let you go

But if you hold mine
I know we'll be fine
Your hand will never feel too tight
Even if the night is full of fright
And it's you I wish
That would let go
If the odds for both of us are damn too low

And if you hold me once more
Trust that we'll make it even through the storm...

I love you

I love you.

I love you.

I love you.

I love you.

I love you.

But you don't.

Second chances

I was 17 when I promised my late father that I would go places and I would take him and my mom to those worlds. More than a decade has passed and I am still unable to keep that promise. I am stuck in a moment, like the big river stone growing each year in the same place and never having the chance to move.

Life maybe about second chances, i guess. and about forgiving ourselves for everything, every failure,every opportunities passed and every wasted minute of unhapiness.

Heartbreak

Dear mate,

You know you're breaking my heart. And each day, the pieces of me shatter like little broken glass i am unable to put back together. and the pain is killing me.

can you stop what i'm feeling? can we go back to the days we were both young and full of dreams?can you hold my hands tight? can you kiss me until i am unable to breathe ? can you call my name and say it out loud? can you just give us a chance, if only for a second?

i dont think i really am over you. when i think of you, i feel like i could do anything, even fly. i only have to close my eyes and i see you. but no, now that you're with someone else, there's nothing to feel but lost. i loved you and it's never going to matter. not anymore.

and it's devastating to even realize that i'm the best thing you never had.

your loving mate who's still hurting,

Lark 10911

Porn vs sexy time

yeah, it's no big deal. tried watching , 10 sec and i'm tired of it already. i guess nothing beats the real thing. and maybe doing it with the person you're attracted to.

there's no sense watching other people doing it. it's too personal that seeing it makes you realize that yeah this is intrusion. i'd rather do it spontaneously,instantaneously.

If I die before I wake tomorrow

If I die before I wake...

I hope I dream of the man I could have been with and...
in my wedding dress where he would look at me as if he's the luckiest guy on earth
as if I'm the most beautiful thing in the world
as if we'd live forever
and kiss me as if it were the last and first time

If I die before I wake...

I wish my dreams were of filled ambitions and...
of places i saw myself, in serbian snow wearing my russian hat
bicycling with the leaves falling in korean autum,
and walking barefoot while raining in paris
and summer gazing in the pyramids of egypt

If I die before I wake...

I would dream of what dreams were made of....
riding in the helicopter and landing on the rigs in arctic seas
holding the blueprint of the future
and getting ready to the public charity events

If I die before I wake...

I hope the people I'd leave behind will move on
and still remember me
and my life

If I die before I wake...

I pray the Lord my soul to keep.

Scared

Last month i went to the doctor to check on my APE and the result came out quite scary. I have some small lumps in my chest and my doctor wants to have an apocolartic view or of it. Wow, i mean WOW. I'm scared to go back at my chest ultrasound. i really am. gosh, i wish i could tell someone.

i really do. :(

The day it bit

It was a Sunday, around 2 pm when I decided yes, this is it. You know that time in your life when you start to look at things thoroughly and realize that the world you live in no longer fits the person you are now. That day , the sound of my mother's voice when she swore for the millionth time, and when the dry towel touched my skin as she hit me as she always does, it was that moment. I finally came to my senses. Enough.

Nobody has the right to treat me that way, even if she was mother. Nobody has any right to abuse me emotionally and physically. I am human, and despite all my imperfections, I have a right to be happy.

While many would think that I am a scared chick for not immediately leaving even as I am writing this whole thing, I am in the process of taking one bold step taking and saving enough money so that when that amount is met, I will leave for another country. And this is due within the year.